In my least favorite episode of Bar Rescue ever, Jon invites Dustin Drai, nightlife authority and Vice President of Drai’s Entertainment to guest host for him while he is off doing other important things and leaving me to cry like an inconsolable baby.

I hate to be classist here but if I’ve learned one thing from Jon it’s to own my shit. Therefore, to be honest, Dustin comes off to me as someone who is successful simply because he has a huge safety net, and I prefer experts who have come up, at least partially, through the school of hard knocks because I think it shows an elevated level of problem-solving skills, creativity, and mettle.

The only reason I would ever listen to a word Dustin says about anything other than his dad’s companies is because Jon actively chose him to tell it to me, and I trust Jon. Also, I’m not a complete jerk so common decency would impact my behavior as well. Nonetheless, while Dustin has Jon’s faith, he lacks his commanding nature and often sounds to me like a petulant child barking orders or demanding answers to the question, “Why?” when I tell him no.

Mark Tafoya, the owner of La Perla Sports Bar and Cantina in Glendale, Arizona, also has a difficult time listening to Dustin but for different reasons. Mark doesn’t listen because he’s a smug dickhead with a permanent smirk on his face. He is so filled with excuses, I believe he is the person Jon wrote Don’t Bullsh*t Yourself! for.

I can only dream of how Jon would have handled Mark, especially when he shuts down the bar during stress test and Mark talks back to him like he did to Dustin, defiantly stating, “These are MY customers” to let Dustin know Mark’s the one in control. TWICE.

In the words of my favorite hospitality expert, “NO FRICKEN WAY!”

Jon would have eaten Mark for dinner with a side of raw chicken au jus, and Paramount could have made some extra cash by airing it on Pay-per-View. Boy, did the world miss out.

Dustin does eventually shut it down, though, but with less than half the vigor and a hundredth of the brilliance Jon has on an unhurried sick day.

Although Dustin seems amateurish to me, he does eventually influence Mark to put his energy into owning and managing his bar instead of socializing in it and giving half of it away every night. Dustin also provides advice fitting for Mark and many other Bar Rescue bar owners who bought their establishments because they liked to party with their friends: Being the most liked person in your bar is not the same thing as being the owner.

Opening night runs smoothly, and Mark says some surprisingly wonderful things about how much Dustin has helped him. I am not sure what to think about Dustin because Jon served as senior consultant on this rescue, and I barely want to give Dustin credit for executing Jon’s vision. Dustin failed to impress me, likely due to the unattainable standards and exceedingly high expectations set by Jon’s illustrious illustriousness.

The good news, though, is that positive things still come out of Bar Rescue episodes with a guest host. Another owner and their staff have hope because they are in a better situation and have been set up for success—either directly or indirectly thanks to Jon.